Can Someone That Is a Nonborn Again Christian Date a Born Again Christian?
Does my dear for a nonbeliever mean God volition save her?
- May vii, 2013
- past
Is the burning love for her an indication of God'due south will and that God would relieve her, or am I only attracted to her?
Question
I am in a relationship with a Christian lady (though she is non born again), but I'yard still praying for her salvation and have a burning dear for her. Is the burning dearest for her an indication of God's will and that God would save her, or am I simply attracted to her?
Answer
Thank you for your question. There'south a lot to call up nearly here, so let me effort to bring some Scripture to bear.
Kickoff things showtime. Your question indicates that the woman you're in a relationship with is a "Christian lady," but that she is not "born again." I realize that people in a number of unlike cultures (including some hither in the U.S.) might identify themselves as "Christian" in some manner even though they have not been "born once again," but the Bible teaches u.s. that such a cocky-identification is wrong. As a purely biblical matter, if nosotros are not "born over again," we are not followers of Christ ("Christians") as the Bible defines that term. You lot said in your question that you are nonetheless praying for this woman'due south salvation, so information technology seems like you know this, simply merely in example — and for the benefit of others who might read this — let's analyze.
In John 3:three, Jesus tells a ruler of the Jews: "Truly, truly, I say to yous, unless 1 is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God." So what does it mean to be built-in again? Nosotros will exist born again — given new life in Christ — if we repent of our sins and believe the Gospel of Christ: that there is a perfectly holy God who created the world and all that is in it (including mankind) by His word and for His celebrity (Genesis 1-2); that we equally homo beings have sinned confronting this perfectly holy God, and therefore nosotros deserve and are under His only condemnation (Genesis 3; Romans 3, Ephesians 2:ane-3); that God, because of His great love and mercy, sent His own Son, Jesus Christ, to alive a perfect life and dice on the cantankerous every bit a substitute, to absolve for the sins of all those who would repent of their sins and believe in Him, and to restore those who believe in Him to eternal fellowship with God (John 3:16; Ephesians 2:iv-9; Acts 4:12); and that God raised Jesus from the dead, to make clear to the world that Jesus is God's Son, and that all He said about himself and the Gospel is true (Luke 24:1-12; Acts 3:12-21).
Now to the center of your question. If yous are clear that this adult female is not a believer (not a follower of Jesus as the Bible defines that term) so it is non God's will that you pursue her every bit a wife — at least non now. The Bible is clear that believers are only to marry other believers. In 1 Corinthians 7:39, Paul instructs that marriages of believers are to be "only in the Lord" — that is, only to other Christians. Also, Ephesians 5:22-33, the fullest explanation we accept in the Bible of what a godly, biblical spousal relationship is, makes clear that what God calls u.s. to in wedlock — to bring God glory by intentionally reflecting the manner Christ has loved the church and the fashion the church responds to the leadership of Christ — tin can only be carried out by people who are themselves in Christ.
Your question also mentioned that you take developed really potent amore for this woman. I don't doubt it. Theological truths and biblical prohibitions don't automatically inoculate believers from attraction to and affection for nonbelievers — especially when they get involved in a close romantic relationship. Yet, you cannot assume that because you lot feel strongly for this woman, God will save her. And it seems even clearer that you should not use such an supposition as grounds to ally her earlier yous are fully convinced the Lord has saved her. Remember, the manner God nigh always communicates His volition to His people is not with mystical signs or emotions in the pits of our stomachs, but through His Word in Scripture. And God will never "tell" us, through some feeling or sign, to practise something that clearly contradicts His Word.
I know this answer may be a lilliputian difficult to swallow. I will pray that the Lord will requite you lot wisdom and faithfulness to His Give-and-take as you think through how to proceed.
Blessings,
SCOTT CROFT
Copyright 2013 Scott Croft. All rights reserved.
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About the Author
Scott Croft
Scott Croft served for several years as chairman of the elders at Capitol Loma Baptist Church in Washington, D.C., where he wrote and taught the Friendship, Courtship & Marriage and Biblical Manhood & Womanhood Cadre Seminars. Scott now lives in the Louisville, Ky., area with his wife, Rachel, and son, William, where he works as an attorney and serves as an elder of Third Avenue Baptist Church building.
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Source: https://www.boundless.org/advice/does-my-love-for-a-nonbeliever-mean-god-will-save-her/
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